Keywords / 1340s
You sold my dead bird to a blind kid?
Harry
Cannonball!
Ron Burgundy
She's not my special lady, she's my fucking lady friend. I'm just helping her conceive, man!
The Dude
I have to return some videotapes.
Patrick Bateman
God damn you Walter! You fuckin' asshole! Everything's a fuckin' travesty with you, man! And what was all that shit about Vietnam? What the FUCK, has anything got to do with Vietnam? What the fuck are you talking about?
The Dude
Anti-quitsies, you're it, quitsies, no anti-quitsies, no startsies!
Harry
It's ok, I'm a limo driver!
Lloyd
It's so damn hot... milk was a bad choice.
Ron Burgundy
No, in the movie, they catch up to him half mile down the road and slit his throat! Hahaha! It was a good one.
Lloyd
You're so wise. You're like a miniature Buddha, covered in hair.
Ron Burgundy
I got worms!
Lloyd
You'll have to excuse my friend. He's a little slow. The town is back *that* way.
Lloyd
Nihilists! Fuck me. I mean, say what you like about the tenets of National Socialism, Dude, at least it's an ethos.
Walter Sobchak
Well, for one thing, I think he was probably a closet homosexual who did a lot of cocaine. That whole Yale thing.
Patrick Bateman
I'm into, uh, well, murders and executions, mostly.
Patrick Bateman
No Luis. It's not me. You're mistaken.
Patrick Bateman
Hey guys. Woah, Big Gulps, huh? All right! Well, see ya later.
Lloyd
Do you like Huey Lewis and The News?
Patrick Bateman
I told that Kraut a fuckin' thousand times, I don't roll on shabbos!
Walter Sobchak
You know, Dude, I myself dabbled in pacifism once. Not in 'Nam of course.
Walter Sobchak
There is a moment of sheer panic when I realize that Paul's apartment overlooks the park... and is obviously more expensive than mine.
Patrick Bateman
Hell, I can get you a toe by 3 o'clock this afternoon... with nail polish. These fucking amateurs...
Walter Sobchak
Sweet Lincoln's mullet.
Ron Burgundy
Hey everyone! Come see how good I look!
Ron Burgundy
That rug really tied the room together.
The Dude
Ow! Fucking fascist!
The Dude
TRY GETTING A RESERVATION AT DORSIA NOW YOU FUCKING STUPID BASTARD! YOU, FUCKING BASTARD!
Patrick Bateman
The arsonist has oddly shaped feet.
Ron Burgundy
I'm gonna punch you in the ovary, that's what I'm gonna do. A straight shot. Right to the babymaker
Ron Burgundy
I got robbed by a sweet old lady on a motorized cart. I didn't even see it coming.
Lloyd
I'M IN A GLASS CASE OF EMOTION
Ron Burgundy
I! The Royal "we"! You know, the editorial...
The Dude
We don't usually pick up hitchhikers... but I'm-a gonna go with my instincts on this one. Saddle up partner!
Lloyd
Harry, you're alive... and a horrible shot!
Lloyd
Hmmm... Sure, that and a pair of testicles.
The Dude
Austria! Well, then. G'day mate! Let's put another shrimp on the barbie!
Lloyd
And I'm Ron Burgundy. Go fuck yourself, San Diego.
Ron Burgundy
I hate the fuckin' Eagles man.
The Dude
You know I don't speak Spanish.
Ron Burgundy
Gas man. How the hell did they know that I got gas?
Mental
What do you think the chances are of a guy like you and a girl like me... ending up together?
Lloyd
Your compliment was sufficient, Luis.
Patrick Bateman
H-hey, this is a private residence, man!
The Dude
I like to dissect girls. Did you know I'm utterly insane?
Patrick Bateman
I love scotch. Scotchy, scotch, scotch. Here it goes down, down into my belly...
Ron Burgundy
Donny, shut the f- when do we play?
Walter Sobchak
This is what happens when you fuck a stranger in the ass!
Walter Sobchak
OVER THE LINE!
Walter Sobchak
I'm a man who discovered the wheel and built the Eiffel Tower out of metal and brawn. That's what kind of man I am. You're just a woman with a small brain. With a brain a third the size of us. It's science.
Ron Burgundy
WE'VE LANDED ON THE MOON!
Lloyd
I'm not a baby, I am a man. I am an anchorman.
Ron Burgundy
I said, "Do you love me?" and she said, "No, but that's a really nice ski mask."
Lloyd
Oh well here, take this extra pair of gloves, my hands are starting to get a little sweaty.
Lloyd
I didn't blame anyone for the loss of my legs... some Chinaman took them from me in Korea... but I went out and achieved anyway!
The Big Lebowski
Am I wrong?
Walter Sobchak
Saw it in a movie once.
Lloyd
Man, you are one pathetic loser. No offense.
Lloyd
I expected the Rocky Mountains to be a little rockier than this.
Harry
Oh, uh, it's the pleats... the pleats in the pants. It's an optical illusion. I was just about to take them back... to the pants store. Oh this is embarrassing.
Ron Burgundy
Harry... your hands are freezing!
Lloyd
Kick his ass, Sea Bass!
Sea Bass Friend
Hey, careful, man, there's a beverage here!
The Dude
Obviously you're not a golfer.
The Dude
Thanks. Hey, I guess they're right. Senior citizens, although slow and dangerous behind the wheel, can still serve a purpose. I'll be right back. Don't you go dying on me!
Lloyd
I was thinking the same thing. That John Denver's full of shit, man.
Lloyd
Nice set of hooters you got there!
Harry
You want a toe? I can get you a toe, believe me. There are ways, Dude. You don't wanna know about it, believe me.
Walter Sobchak
Mary... I desperately wanna make love to a school boy.
Lloyd
They're gonna kill that poor woman.
The Dude
The first time I set eyes on Mary Swanson, I just got that old fashioned romantic feeling where I'd do anything to bone her.
Lloyd
Mr. Treehorn treats objects like women, man.
The Dude
Look, Larry. Have you ever heard of Vietnam?
Walter Sobchak
Would you like an atomic pepper, Mr. Mentalino?
Harry
Why you going to the airport? Flying somewhere?
Lloyd
If you don't shut your fucking mouth, I will kill you.
Patrick Bateman
Shut the fuck up, Donny.
Walter Sobchak
I just figured she was a raging alcoholic.
Lloyd
Yeah, well. The Dude abides.
The Dude
My need to engage in homicidal behaviour on a massive scale cannot be corrected but, uh, I have no other way to fulfill my needs.
Patrick Bateman
Oh, I don't know, Lloyd. The French are assholes.
Harry
According to the map we've only gone about 4 inches.
Harry
Tic-Tac, sir?
Lloyd
Donny you're out of your element! Dude, the Chinaman is not the issue here!
Walter Sobchak
A tad? A tad, Lloyd? You drove almost a sixth of the way across the country in the wrong direction! Now we don't have enough money to get to Aspen, we don't have enough money to get home, we don't have enough money to eat, we don't have enough money to sleep!
Harry
You're entering a world of pain, son. We know that this is your homework. We know that you stole a car.
Walter Sobchak
Wanna hear the most annoying sound in the world?
Lloyd
You mark that frame an 8, and you're entering a world of pain.
Walter Sobchak
Yeah I called her up. She gave me a bunch of crap about me not listening to her, or something. I don't know, I wasn't really paying attention.
Harry
Great Odin's raven.
Ron Burgundy
I love poetry, and a glass of scotch, and, of course, my friend Baxter here.
Ron Burgundy
Flush you bastard.
Harry
Fuck it, Dude, let's go bowling.
Walter Sobchak
Just when I thought you couldn't possibly be any dumber, you go and do something like this... and totally redeem yourself!
Harry
We got no food, no jobs... our PETS' HEADS ARE FALLING OFF!
Lloyd
Your money is being held by a kid named Larry Sellers. Real fucking brat, but I'm sure your goons can get it off him. I mean, he's fifteen.
The Dude
Extra gloves? You've had this pair of extra gloves this whole time?
Harry
Does the Pope shit in the woods?
The Dude
Is this your homework, Larry? Is this your homework, Larry?
Walter Sobchak
How now brown cow.
Ron Burgundy
Fuck sympathy! I don't need your fuckin' sympathy, man, I need my fucking johnson!
The Dude
You've got a dirty whorish mouth.
Ron Burgundy
Son of a bee-sting.
Ron Burgundy
Fucking dipshit with a nine toed woman.
Walter Sobchak
That's a lovely accent you have. New Jersey?
Lloyd
I'm storming your castle on my steed, m'lady.
Ron Burgundy
Who the fuck are the Knutsens?
The Dude
Phone's ringing, Dude.
Donny
That's right, Dude, they peed on your fucking rug.
Walter Sobchak
You're a fucking ugly bitch. I want to stab you to death, and then play around with your blood.
Patrick Bateman
Where's the fucking money Lebowski?
The Dude
Look at our current situation with that camel fucker over in Iraq. Pacifism is not something to hide behind.
Walter Sobchak